Reflections in the mirror

Well, as I am laying in bed unable to sleep due to my long nap this afternoon, I have started to come across some questions in my mind. As we are making this transition to Malawi, one of the things that has been drilled into our minds throughout our training is the importance of understanding culture.

 

We as Americans tend not to pay any attention to culture since most of us tend to stay within our own, and we fail to realize how much that shapes our understanding of the world around us. We make assumptions and judgments based on our own worldview, which we fail to realize is largely cultural. Even our spiritual understanding is so deeply tied to our cultural values that often we are unable to separate the two.

 

For instance, Americans in general tend to value blatant, brutal honesty. People value truthfulness at all costs, no matter how hurtful or damaging it may be. We only need to look as far as our reality shows, court TV, and media coverage of politics and celebrity gossip. However, Malawians tend to value respect, propriety, and honor above all else, even perhaps at the expense of complete and absolute honesty. American Christians would tend to be very judgmental of that; we may make judgments about the spirituality of those who claim to be Christians but do not follow our understanding of spirituality, citing Biblical teachings on honesty. But what then do we make of passages that teach patience, kindness, meekness, and peace? Perhaps Malawians judge our spirituality based on our failure to exercise those values. So, in God'€™s eyes, is one of these views correct and one incorrect? Which of these Biblical values are most important? Have we let our cultural background dictate so much of who we are that it taints a true spiritual understanding?

 

The more I begin to question these things, the more examples come to mind- views on dating, marriage, divorce, family, extended family, work ethic, the distribution of wealth and resources in our world. There are endless examples. I am beginning to think that we cannot have a true, accurate spiritual understanding without being in community with people who are different than we are. Being able to understand the differences of others forces us to look in the mirror and see ourselves as others see us, which is very often drastically different than we see ourselves.

 

 I wonder, if we could see ourselves through the eyes of Africans, what would we as Americans look like? Do they see us- a small group of people with the largest amount of wealth and resources- as selfish? Do they wonder why, if the Bible teaches us to love our neighbors as ourselves, we turn our backs on our African neighbors as their children die and their communities are ravaged by disease? Do they see our ambivalence to their life and death struggles as a form of racism and hatred?

 

I can't say that I can accurately state how Africans views these things. But, I can say that as I look now at where I am and consider the place where I came from, I feel very uneasy looking at the reflection in the mirror.

 

Our most basic necessity

Well, this has been a wonderful week. On Tuesday, we traveled two hours north to our children's homes in Chiwengo village. This is the village that used to be used as the presidential retreat for the former president, and now COTN rents these brick homes very inexpensively to house 85 children. There are three homes that house 20-25 kids each with house parents and several aunties and uncles for each house. For the older teenagers, there is a boys home and a girls home with aunties and uncles. The school is very close, and there is a soccer field nearby as well. While we were there, I really felt like this place is every child's dream. The homes are very nice by Malawi standards, and the children get to run around this beautiful place surrounded by their many, many brothers and sisters. They play with one another and just enjoy life. Again, my thoughts were, "Hmm...maybe I could live here and play all day long."

The other thing that made such an impression on me while I was there was how well disciplined and respectful these children are. They wake up in the morning, and each of them has chores to do before they go to school. They sweep, mop, do laundry, help take care of younger children etc. Then, they gather for morning devotions lead by the house parents. Even the children as young as 2 are sitting there attentively listening to devotions. Then, they get dressed and go to school. The younger ones come home at noon and eat luch and play. The older kids come home at 2, then have additional tutoring by the staff. School is much more difficult for them than in America. There are very few books; there is not paper to take notes. The teacher speaks and they repeat things, but they never have an opportunity to study their own books. They have to work much harder to do welll academically. By 4, then they are able to play and have free time. They eat dinner and bathe, and then prepare for their evening devotion. How may of us are disciplined enough to have two devotions each and every day???

Yesterday, I went back to Chitipi farm. Chris tutors several of the children there in the afternoons, so I went along. I was asked to work with one of the children in that home named Tapewa. She is mentally disabled and cannot speak, stand, or walk. She is only able to sit and make a few noises, but she can definitely laugh. I was told that she is disabled due to malnutrition in infancy. Recently, she has been evaluated at a rehab center, and they recommended some exercises for her to help her gain more mobility. So, I helped her stand, exercised her legs and arms, and helped her clap. Some of the girls would sing for her and she would just laugh and laugh. She is just so special to me. She is so sweet and innocent and just like a little angel. She already really likes me and and tries to scoot over to where I am when she sees me. 

There is also a disabled boy in Chiwengo named Myonko- also mentally disabled due to malnutrition in infancy. He cannot speak or respond to commands of any type. But, I spent some time with him, and he knows me and always wants to sit on my lap. With both of them it is just heartbreaking to me that they must live life this way for a totally senseless reason. They will never know the joys of relationships or communication or achievement or self sufficiency. They have suffered because of a lack of something that the rest of us in America are suffering from because of overabundance and gluttony. The one and only thing that they do understand, though, is love. They respond to and seek those who love on them. It is the most basic necessity for all of us. Even though they look at you with eyes that do not demonstrate any comprehension or thought, they know when you love them, and they return that love over and over again.